What is a Quafaie?


Quafaie (pronounced: kwa FAY) are fantasy creatures that exist in the fantasy writing of Hugh Kemeny, and are created by him. They are primarily in Hugh Kemeny’s Black Phoenix short stories...

To learn more, read this post: What is a Quafaie?

Saturday, August 27, 2011

Blocked??

Sometimes I don't understand people. Ok, probably most of the time, but it is more some of the things people do that I don't fully understand. So, anyone reading my blog who can help me understand this following scenario, I would appreciate it....

A few years ago I met a guy in the summer. We seemed to hit it off. However, at the end of the summer we were heading to different parts of the country for school (university). When we parted we agreed to be friends. We stayed in touch periodically.
The following summer we got together a couple times. We never had anything sexual, just, what to me felt like a deep connection, spiritual almost.
Over the rest of that year we again stayed in periodic contact (again opposite ends of the country).
In January of the next year (5-6 months after we last saw each other), he replied to a note I had on Facebook that I would make something for the first 5 people that replied to the note.
It took me a year and I finally got something made for him.
Over the course of that year however, he started to not reply to my simple "how is it going?" emails / messages. I didn't even get a reply on where to send the item I had made for him (so I sent it to an address I had for someone I was sure he was still in contact with).
It was also around that time I happened to notice that we were no longer friends on Facebook - I initially thought perhaps some server broke the connection (it had happened before to me with other friends - several years ago). I asked to be his friend again, but never did get a reply.
Before the disappearing of Facebook friendship, I noticed he had a boyfriend. I thought that was great for him - there was, in my opinion, nothing more than what I hoped would be a good friendship.
Needless to say, after sending the gift off, and no reply to my friend request, I took some time to purge my strong emotions for him, but still hoped to be / stay friends - this was in about February.

The other day I messaged him with the following (edited only for personal info - names, places, etc):
I'm in [town] for a few days for family stuff. If you're free on Monday, or possibly Tuesday, to meet up for tea and catch up on stuff, it would be nice to see you again.
I can best be reached on my mobile (call or text): [number given].
If you don't have time to meet, I hope life is treating you you well.


Today I happened to notice that his name was greyed out in my message center on Facebook, and can't see his profile. To me it looks like he probably blocked me... I just don't fully understand why.

This why is where if anyone can help me understand I'd appreciate it....
I was not pestering him - my last message was in January, before that in December. There were a few in August and September last year - all along the lines of "hey how was your summer / haven't heard from you in a while, hope all is well."
I never received a message from him to say that he didn't want contact with me. In fact his last message to me (April last year), was (edited for some content - what he was doing, and other stuff that seemed irrelevant to the context of his message related to this post):
As much as I want to see you i just doesn't seem very possible both timing wise and for the kinda of state i am in right now. It has kind of been an emotional roller coaster with [work]. I am barely getting by as it is, and i feel i want to be able to actually connect rather than you see me in my emotional and tired state. I hope you understand, I am really sorry. its all been a bit overwhelming.
with love,


Unless I am mistaken, that message sounds to me like he cared about me. So why the silent treatment? why the unfriending (if that was him)? why the Facebook block? why not say something to let me know not to contact him if he does not want to be contacted?


Ok, that helped purge the little emotional attachment I still have for him. Though the unknown is still going to bother me a little - as I will still be wondering if there was hope for us to stay in contact, and possibly have something in the future.

Wednesday, August 24, 2011